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bumpingpenisblox

When I was little and went in the tub, I'd stick my fingers up my asshole and feel my rectum, and any lump of shit that's sitting in it.

Oh, yeah, one time me and a friend filled up a water gun with piss (it was called the Pee Pee 7) and sprayed another "friend" with it.

I used to set-up my Gameboy camera in my bathroom, and take naked pictures of myself. I would spread my asshole apart and look at them in all of their pixelated glory and say to myself, "Huh. So that's what it looked like."

Yeah. I don't know. I guess it got me off or something as a kid.

I dug holes in my backyard and threw worms, slugs, bugs, and shit into them and mashed them up with a pick and made "Mud Pie". I once ate several spoonfuls of it before my mother found me and forced me to vomit it all up.

Yep

I was about to post in this thread and then I realized that I wasn't as messed up as the other robots that are going to post in this thread.

I fapped in class when I was 11 or 12. ._.
I shat in my bathtub when I was really young. I wish I could apologize to my family for that.
Turning down girls who asked me out during my childhood/adolescence.

oh shit, you did that too?

I did it once or twice just out of curiosity but then I was like "alright fuck that thats gotta stop"

I pissed my bed until I was 14 about, and a couple times after that, even.
The look of shame and the questions I got everytime I brought down my laundry were so bad, I would start sleeping on the pissed sheets for weeks, or sometimes hide them in the closet.

i killed a shit load birds with an air rifle, i mean a shitload, 3 a day sometimes if it was a "good day", i hunted for about 2 or 3 years...i was maybe in the 4 or 5 grade...

sometime from trees, fence although most were from this power line were they would always stand at, and i would creep up on them, lean against a tree, and shoot, i saw the feathers just fall off as the pellet made the impact, and slowly the bird would start to descend...i got this fucking feeling, it was crazy

i feel bad for all the birds though...

>-Also, when I was very young, probably 8 or 9, I used to take pieces of toilet paper, piss on them, and wrap them around my penis. I don't know why I did this, but for some reason, I thought my penis head looked liked Kelsey Grammer's head (My parents watched a lot of Frasier).

I can't stop laughing. FUCK.

>>9293413

ITT: Things future serial killers do during their childhood.

>>9293034
>my penis head looked like Kelsey Grammer's head
>LOL WTF AM I READING

>>9293455

Reaction face is exactly my face.

>>9293404

Same man, except I did until 12.

It's a real bitch. I slept on pissed sheets and hid underwear under the bed to avoid embarrassment.

>>9293413
this is not normal

>>9293404

I pissed my bed until I was 17. Even worse, my younger brother in elementary school slept in the same bed as me because we were poor. Also, I had to wear diapers until I was in the 7th grade.

Also, when I was young (1st grade), a group of us boys thought it would be hilarious for us to pull down our pants and show our underwear to a group of girls. When I did it, I forgot I had thomas the tank engine underwear on. Never have I been more embarrassed in my life

>>9293434

i turned out somewhat fine...

>>9293475

i know, some of my relatives even knew about it, didn't even tell me to stop or nothing...fuck

oh well thats all behind me now...

>>9293545

i would display them with pride.

once in kindergarten we told this fat kid that during a pillow fight he killed our other friend. the friend was laying down and still, the fat kid started to freak the fuck out. it was my first taste of purposeful lying.

the way that fat kid's face turned to pure sorrow in less than a quarter of a second...holy shit, man.
i also regret learning how to do that at such a young age ;_;

>>9293485

When wearing the diapers, I meant wearing them to sleep. From when I was in kindergarten to middle school, I would piss my bed every single night. I bet my old bedroom reeked of the smell of dried urine

When i was about 12, Sonic Adventure 2 was my favorite game of all time. At about that same time, I used to fap to furry art of the Sonic characters.

That's about as bad as it ever got, I think.

Maybe tomorrow I'll wet down some toilet paper and make my dick look like Mr. T

>>9293034
I fapped during a spanish class in 7th grade. It didn't start out like that, I was simply itchy from pubes growing in. I don't even know why I started doing it. Some kid called me out on it too.

I used to take shits in the backyard for no apparent reason. I would squat and shit right on the cement patio and when questioned I said it wasn't me. We didn't have any pets.

I would piss in my lego box regularly. This went on for probably a month until, I'm assuming, my room reeked of piss and my mom stopped me. I would still do it occasionally though.

I would also, for reasons at all, remove all my clothes and sit naked in the back of my dad's pickup truck at 6am. My parents would wake up and be unable to find me and there I would be hanging out naked in his truck.


All of these things were between the ages of 6 and 10.

God I was weird.

I once masturbated in class. I was 14 and I'm 90% sure nobody noticed. There weren't even any attractive girls in the class, I was just bored and had a boner.

I found my dad's porn folder on favorites and later, a VHS tape with Azns with Amazon forest pubes on the cover.

I was traumatized for weeks after that. I had to to try really hard to regain my dad's trust (femanon here...).

I felt so guilty after I first fapped. I was probably in the 6th or 7th grade. I used to regret I started fapping, but now I don't give a fuck

Sometimes, when I was laying in bed with my dog, I'd lift my legs up and squeeze out little shit nuggets, and my dog would eat them directly from my asshole.

>>9293034
I used to kill small animals with my compound bow when I was 8-12. It started when I missed a deer target and hit a bird that was sitting on top of it. The fucking arrow went through that robin halfway and then stuck. I also used to torture sunfish when I caught them and then throw them back to ward off the others. By torture, I mean I would leave them on the hook, and swing them into the ground/rocks/trees. I also used to blowtorch them with a lighter and a can of hairspray/bug spray. I was doing this with a friend, and I threw it at him. It hit him in the face and stuck for a second. When I got older, I got an air pistol that shot out darts. I used to go for squirrels with it. It basically nailed them to the trees.

I had a friend who was a girl that was REALLY attractive all through elementary school. I regret not having her hang out with me more. We drifted apart in middle school and she's now a massive slut and I'm a neckbeard.

>>9293721

I should have expected nothing less from /r9k/.

>>9293656
I... I did that. I didn't have a boner because I'm a girl... But yeah. I was bored and it felt Good.

... I was in 6th grade. And. I looked over to see my English teacher staring at me with a horrified look on her face. :( At the time, I wasn't really bothered, but looking back...

>>9293604
HAHAHA classic. Idk why that's so funny, but it is.

>>9293721

fuck. nothing gets me anymore but that made me cringe.

>>9293746
I stopped when I hit a squirrel in the tail fairly high up in a big tree. It pinned the squirrel to the tree and it was kind of dangling there, helpless. I couldn't do anything to help it down because it was up too high, the tree was too big around and there were no branches low enough for me to grab. I felt horrible, so I got out an air rifle for accuracy and shot it between the eyes, not knowing what else I could do. The force took the squirrel off the dart, but I'll bet it's still embedded in that tree somewhere.

During middle school, I used to email random people and tell them stupid shit. Mostly nigger jokes. Also, I found these emails in my parent's email address list in their windows mail account.

>>What the fuck was I thinking

I used to go to sunday school,the dark hall down to the bathrooms terrified me so I used to shit right outside of the building in the bushes.I think I was 7. one time some older kid saw me and he was like 'what are you doing back there' I had no fucking idea what to say,there was a huge fresh little kid turd laying behind me,so I said the first thing that came to mind 'uhh,im going to san francisco' I look back at this and I dont know wether to laugh or be mortfied. the guy left with a WTF face. I honestly thought that I had fooled him...

Fellow bedwetter reporting in. Most of the time, I didn't even bother to wash the sheets and the piss just dried there marinating in the 90 degree Phoenix heat coming in from my window.

ITT: serial killers

top 3 childhood signs:
1. piss the bed past the age of 10
2. pleasure from Torturing/killing small animals
3. Burning stuff all the time/significant things

>>9293907

Is it bad that I can relate to all three of these?

>>9293934
Murdering people is bad, people don't do it.

>>9293934

Probably. Moreso if you fap to gore/have an unhealthy obsession with your mother.

>>9293907
I stopped wetting the bed when I was 4 and I never burned anything serious. Fuck, all of my friends did this stuff with me.

>>9293941
Why is murdering people bad?

When I was a young boy I wiped my boogers under the desks at school, on the carpet at home, on my pet dogs and cats, and sometimes on my parents when they weren't looking

I play with my vagina all the damn time, nobody notices =D

I once threw a huge rock at a fatass neighborhood cat hit it between the eyes. AND SUDDENLY, BLOOD FUCKING EVERYWHERE

I went up to my neighbor's house and choked their chickens. Like literally, I would go and torture their chickens. I also was at a sleepover once and my friend's cat had just had kittens, and I was pulling the kittens away from the mom just to fuck with them.

I was such a fucking douche, I haven't hurt an animal since and it disturbs me that I got pleasure from that.

I regret declining to playing house with a girl when I was in the 2nd grade. I am disappoint

>>9293624
>>9293624
>I would also, for reasons at all, remove all my clothes and sit naked in the back of my dad's pickup truck at 6am. My parents would wake up and be unable to find me and there I would be hanging out naked in his truck.

There has GOT to be more of a story behind this

>>9293034
not taking care of my body is the main thing. but i was a very depressed kid and didn't care about anything.

>>9293964
fuck man, i still do this

My friends and I used to tease this one chinese kid when we were in grade school. And by tease, I mean getting a gang of us little fuckers and chasing him on the playground and calling him racist names

lol he probably a lurker on r9k right now

>>9293876
>'uhh,im going to san francisco'

Oh god I lol'd

>>9294076

I sometimes think I may have been sexually abused but I have no real memories of anything at all. I really don't know.

I used to pick ALL my scabs. I have some nasty scars on my knee from picking at some giant wounds.

Unfortunately, now I have dermatillomania.

>>9293034
>-I fapped in the bathrooms during middle and high school. I also wiped my cum all over the walls of the bathroom stalls for the lulz.

This reminded me of The Squid and the Whale, albeit with bathroom stalls instead of lockers.

>>9294121

Probably repressed memories.

Enjoy seeing creepy uncle Lester at all your family functions.

>>9293413
Me and my buddy would do this fairly often, one time I shot a little baby bird. I don't regret it though, pigeons are scum.

>>9294057
I did this also. wtf, man? :\

>>9294121
Oh man. I hope not, for your sake. That is a really weird situation.

>>9294145
>I used to pick ALL my scabs.

I still do this :\

>>9293434
hunting birds isnt serial-killerish. brutally killing and/or torturing animals is, however.

>>9293721
Jesus fucking christ. Seriously, what the fuck am I reading?

I used to cry until 8th grade :(

>>9293721

I agree anons.
This really made me WTF and proceed to giggle in true Goatse-style reaction psychology.

-My parents caught me trying to suck on my own penis in my bedroom

-I regret eating gas station burritos before going to school and vomiting all over my desk during a movie we were watching in class. This was in high school btw

-I once turned off the bathroom light in Wal-Mart when a guy was taking a shit and ran out.

>>9294205
Dermatillomania is compulsive skin picking.
It means not only do I pick my scabs, I pick any blemish or pimple into oblivion, and then pick that scab until there is a crater in my skin.

I try to avoid touching my face, but my back looks like a minefield.

>>9294287
oh god i lold hard at the last one

I once tried to get a cat to lick yogurt off my dick. Only once though. Fuck their sandpapery tongues >.<

>>9294287
How did your parents react to the self-suck situation?

>>9294302
>It means not only do I pick my scabs, I pick any blemish or pimple into oblivion, and then pick that scab until there is a crater in my skin.

I do that too, sucks, man

>>9294348

We made eye contact and we had a wtf moment for several seconds. They didn't say anything about it and I did slip my pants back on in a snap, though. It turns out they were going to allow me to go on a study abroad trip I had pleaded with them about earlier.

>>9294441
Are you implying you were sucking your own dick in reaction to them maybe no letting you go on a study abroad trip?

I used to wipe my snot into my parents and brothers and sisters food when they weren't looking. I also used to spit into my brother's jar of protein shake powder as well. I did this for a long time and I don't know why

When I was a kid I would pick up my pet rabbits And throw them because I thought it was funny. My parents knew and told me to stop, they even caught me doing it after they told me to stop.

Also, I had a pet cockatail, it was very docile and couldn't fly because of an injured wing, it got bit by a dog before we owned it. Sometimes it would jump off my hand for no reason. When it hit the floor it would be really still almost like it was crying and would be like that for a few minutes after. We got it a female bird as company, eventually we stuck them in the dark in my garage and pretty much stopped playing with them or taking them out of the cage they got really mean afterwards and in the rare times when I did take them out, I would throw the bird onto the garage floor so it wouldn't bite. One time I threw it down and it's eye sorta started bleeding, I blamed it on the female and we got it some cream from the pet store.

I feel really bad about how that bird was treated, it was the nicest bird that never bit anyone when we first got it. I still remember how mean it got when we stopped taking care of it. Eventually it died because we left it out in the rain. It lived a long life and we took really good care of it up until the last year of it's life.

>>9294502

Maybe. I don't know. I never did go on that trip because I failed three classes and had to repeat them in summer school

>>9294568
Dick. The fuck is wrong with you? Birds and rabbits are maybe two of the most docile pets you can have and you hurt them.
Asshole.

I threw away all my grandpa's cigarettes when I was like 10 because of the propaganda I saw on TV. Needless to say, he went apeshit

>>9294568

You and your entire family should fucking burn in hell.

>>9294598
Did you get an asswhoopin? I would have whooped your ass and burned you with a fresh pack of cigarettes. I guess that's why I'll never have kids.

>>9294640

I ended up being sodomized by him in the bathroom while my parents were at work.

LOL JK HE JUST SCOLDED ME

I used to play a game whenever I shat where I would try to make the most secure toilet paper net possible to catch my shit as it fell.

It's actually pretty fun.

Nothing much

i just drew penises on random scraps of paper and hide them in my classmate's backpacks or in their desks

back in the day, I once looked at porn on my dad's computer and got uber paranoid after I forgot to clear the history

NEVER AGAIN

>>9293352

We have so much in common.

>>9293876

LMFAO. WHAT!? HAHA, OH MAN. LMFAO.

>>9294540
>>I used to wipe my snot into my parents and brothers and sisters food

THIS IS WHY I DON'T WANT CHILDREN COMING TO MY HOUSE ON THANKSGIVING.

When I was younger, I had no fear about anyone catching me when I fapped. I'm almost positive everybody in my family knows I fap to traps and dickgirls

I want to hear more stories

bumpblox

I used to suck my dog's dick. No, really. Yes, this is the first time I told anyone.

>>9293276
akuna matada

>>9294921

/thread. Everyone go to bed.

>>9295007
Oh you just HAD to one up everyone.

I was once muted for 2 hours on here for posting a picture of babby

>>9295019
Honestly, it was the first thing that came to my mind. And the only thing. Maybe because it dwarfs everything else I've ever done.

I used to force myself not to shit.

I would literally cross my legs and squeeze to keep it in.

I would go for really long periods without shitting, like weeks, and shit sauce would leak out of my asshole. I would have pains in my stomach and constipation after a while if I even tried to shit.

This went on for a very very long time. I really don't know why I did this. I really don't know.

Keep this going until morning guys. I'm going to bed

I didn't clean under my foreskin until my first year in college.

Never masturbated either, which is why I didn't think of it sooner.

Yes, it's disgusting. At least now I keep that fucker spotless.

>>9294921
I did something sort of similar? I was curious about my dogs dick so I him took outside to have a lookie. But then my brother walks over is like "Sup". I told him the dog had a tick. Pretty sure he believed me.

being incredibly cruel to animals

Used to stick the handle of my barbie brush up my ass

Man I was a weird kid

>>9293434
Ugh, I fucking hate when retards who don't know shit about psychology claim that people who used to be cruel to animals (or even simply hunt them) years ago are likely to be serial killers.

There's a world of difference, you worthless idiots.

I used to rarely bathe. And since I'm circumcised I'd get this ring of dead skin below the tip of my penis.

One time I waited behind a shower curtain while my sister's friend took a shit in the bathroom. It took everything I had not to make a noise or get caught.

>laughed at Carlos Mencia jokes

JESUS CHRIST WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU. No, really, that's the thing you should be most ashamed of OP.

disappointblox

My mom wiped my ass for me until I was 7 or 8.

>>9294623
I'm not that guy, but shut up, shithead.

Your reaction was massively out of proportion.

eat things of the floor, seriously all through primary school.

in kindergarten I can't remember much all I remember is we used to take turns burring each other as deep as possible in the sand pit and leaving each other there till the carers found them.

Alright so I was like 8 or 9, had no idea what masturbating was (I had no internet access or sex-ed), but I ended up feeling what I know realize is horny, and got down on my knees and started rubbing my clit through my pants against a foot stool.

I had no idea it was wrong so I did it a lot, and then did it while I was watching a movie with my dad. He saw me, got up, told me to stop and left.

I look back on that now and holy FUCK was I retarded ;_;

>>9295803
*now, not know

Also he's walked in on me doing stuff while I was naked repeatedly over the years. :|

>>9295812
Lucky father...

Just saying.

2nd or 3rd grade I'd lay my head on my desk and kiss and make out with my arm. I also made out with the desk during class.

I've also ate pieces of paper for some fucking reason.

>>9293860
Fucking lol'd at this one.

>>9295823
I used to eat paper all the time.

When I was about 5-6, I used to piss in the corner of my bedroom.

I have no fucking clue why I did that. Took a month or so for my parents to realize why my room reeked of piss...

Also, since I was scared shitless of waking my Dad at night by flushing, I took a dump on the back lawn at about 1AM one time.

i used to piss under my parents bed, never got caught

also learned how to masturbate by putting the shower pressure on high and directing towards penis

:O

>>9295823

WHAT THE HELL IS THIS GET OUT OF MY HEAD

>>9295883

When I was 12 and someone was in the bathroom when I had to pee, I would pee in my garbage can (._.)

I used to pee in the sink. One day I realized that the sink drain smells like stale urine encrusted hobo...

I once shit and threw it at my neighbors house.

In third grade one of the teachers hatched baby chickens in an incubator through the year, and the eggs that didn't hatch were thrown into the dumpster behind the school.

Well, I discovered some eggs that had been disposed of and thinking I could save the baby chicken inside, I brought it home with me, laid it in front of the fireplace to get warm (smelled like rotting garbage BTW), took it to the playground and played with it, etc.

I think my mom eventually took pity on my stupid ass and got rid of it while i was sleeping.

>>9293721
OHMYGODBLOCKS

>>9295915
>pissed under bead
>never got caught

they knew.

!'m 26....I still shoot birds with an air rifle. Mostly starlings and european sparrows because they are an introduced species to my country. And also cowbirds because they lay their egg's in the nests of songbirds and force them to raise their young.

I once clothes pinned a toads front legs together and back legs together and let him go. I had to once my mom saw me putting him on the side deck roof.. actually don't remember if i took the clothes pins off or not

I also flushed live gold fish down the toilet for the lulz.

Used to shower my lower parts only until the age of 15

Used to piss with my eyes closed until the age of 12

used to masturbate ONLY around friends mothers until 17.

I'm not too normal.

none of this is sadistic at all.

>>9295916
No you get the fuck out of my head!

>>9296123
You are so cool Anonymous, tell me about how sadistic you are. We will all be impressed.

>>9296192

I was being sarcastic, brohemoth.

I once pissed out of my bedroom window when I was roughly aged 10 for no god damn reason.

From around age 7 to 12, I used to pee every day after school in the plants next to my fence and occasionally on my neighbor's dogs on the other side when they were chained up on their side. I loled when I pissed on their faces, but now I regret doing that.

I used to be one of those kids who completely dropped his pants when I used to piss. This used to be in public bathrooms, at school, etc. I wonder if I ever got a reputation for doing that at school...

My parrot called me a twat so I slapped it.

>>9296033

Wow, cowbirds are dicks.

>I thought my penis head looked liked Kelsey Grammer's head (My parents watched a lot of Frasier).

LOLWATS?

I went on a rampage when I was young (10, 12?) and threw all of my family's photo albums into the fireplace and burned them because they didn't buy me Doom.

holy fuck, just had a repressed memory return...

>used to tape penis back between my legs...

>>9301051

A trap in the making you were.

I used to make my cat do backflips by picking it up behind the forelegs and throwing it upwards.

I got really excited once and went for a double-backflip, but he only made about 1-and-a-half turns and went flat on his back. I also used to chase him around the house, screaming and throwing stuffed toys at him.

I feel really sick and depressed recalling this because he turned into my best friend of all time.

Sorry, Smokey. May you rest in peace. ;_:

>>9293034
>I fapped in the bathrooms during middle and high school. I also wiped my cum all over the walls of the bathroom stalls for the lulz.

FUCK YOU, I AM A JANITOR

I used to sneak out into the woods at night and run around naked. There were some awesome hills that we rode our bikes on in the daytime, but at night, after a rainstorm, I'd go slide down them, again naked. I also swam in the pond at night. I used to sneak onto my neighbor's pools and skinny dip as well.

By the way, if any of this turned you on, I'm male. lol

>>9293876
Someone needs to spin this into a meme

I considered Linkin Park deep, and wept to a Lost Prophets song.

>>9301032
>they didn't buy me Doom.

Their loss, doom's great.

>>9301183
ashamed or regretting that? That sounds extremely awesome.

>>9295823
Oh god, I did this after my first girlfriend broke up with me.

I was like, 17.

I was so sad and lonely and I missed having pressure on my lips ;__;

>>9301252

Just more along the lines of making me laugh if any guys read it and thought of some little girl running around doing those things and then realizing they were salivating over a guy.

>>9301277
oh, well, any pedophilic dudes salivating over that probably don't mind little boys

I use to dig for coal in my back yard, I dug massive pits and tried to sell the coal to my neighbors.

I used to catch guppies from the stream near my house and throw them onto my family's metal roof where they would bake in the sun.

>>9293276
>I dug holes in my backyard and [...] shit into them.

>>9301091
When everyone leaves the house I chase my dog around and pretend I'm a dinosaur.

I am 23.

When I was 14 or 15 I accidentaly left my flashdrive full of porn at a friends house and his dad found it. I was never allowed to talk with that friend again, dad kinda over-reacted.

When I was like 13, I slapped the ass of and titsqueezed this hot girl my age. The best part was, she didn't care to much, and said just to not do it again.

>>9300706
FUCKING DIE, I HATED KIDS WHO DID THAT.

I used to pee while I was playing video games. Just, lying down, on my carpet, and let loose.
I peed on that carpet a lot.
Blamed it on the cat.

>>9301421
You also happen to be my hero.

I remember this girl when i was 4 she was 6, she was kind of... slow i guess. She always made sand pies in the sandbox and eat them, not just a bite but gorging through 4 pies orso. She smiled also when you looked at her, all the sand on her teeth.

>>9301421
I do this with my cats. They end up winning. Fucking claws.

>>9301475

I once saw an elderly man drop his pants and piss in a urinal before. Some things never change. Also, I could clearly see his balls and ass

huh. well i would catch frogs and toads, but i had nowhere to put them. to make sure they wouldn't escape i would place a large plastic bucket on top of them so that it was upside down and they couldn't escape, kind of like a dome. well i would leave for a bit and come back and the frogs would be completely dried up and crispy. took me a long time to figure out why.

>>9301421
I did that when I was 6 or so. Pretty awesome if you ask me. I was a Velociraptor from Jurassic Park.

totally ate paper the time

was totally pissed after my parents remodeled the house and put a bathroom off their bedroom so i started pissing in the guest room, rotted the floor they were so pissed then i started pissing out the window and killed the tree that was down there between 10 and 12 its great to have a dick

fingered and felt my cousin up when we were 9 10 she gave me head first time we met didn't know we were related she has not talked to me since

caught big frogs and threw them in the road to see if they were good at frogger

ate dog food when we ran out of cereal one time

bampabampblox

>>9293876
>You pooping in the bushes

- Tried to suck my own dick in front of my friends at school (managed to get the foreskin in lol), that shit never left me for 3 years.

- Wanked in almost every toilet and once wanked in a stairwell, that shit was risky.

- Fapped for the first time in a room with 4 other guys, had communal wanks every day for like 3 years with friends in boarding school haha (not touching each other or any gay stuff, just in the same room lol).

>>9302912
>communal wanks
>not gay
lolwut

- a lot of gay stuff like crossing penis with a guy my age we were 7-8 yrs old i think

- One day I would chase our cat and throw snowballs at him for hours after school. I was a fucking asshole.

- Catched frogs and threw them into a fire

- played with my sisters dolls and lay them in sex positions, one time my sister found out and confronted me, said i had no idea wat she was talking about. One time i pretend her doll was giving me a handjob( yes i masturbated with a fucking doll) and cut my foreskin. shit hurt when i pissed so eventually i told my mom, she asked how the fuck i managed to cut my penis.

- One time i was watching TV in the living room, thought i was alone, hot chick on TV. I dunno why but i cockslapped the TV screen with the chick on, my sister sat 6 feet behind me, saw it all.

>>9303214

Lol, oh god. Who the fuck cockslaps a TV? I'm laughing so hard I can't breathe.

I WANT TO HEAR MORE

I used to eat glue sticks. In kindergarten, whenever we had a project or something, I would ALWAYS eat it. Not a little, but giant bites of it. I didn't give a fuck if anyone saw, but only one person confronted me about it, to which I said something along the lines of, "It tastes good."

hump my brother and play doctor with him

>>9293721
>>9293721
just made this my fb status

>>9295162
I did this too.

>>9293721
This is the worst.

I used to catch lizards to throw them in other kids pants and my own pants as a kid. Dicks and lizards seem like a good mix.

>>9305467
Pics or it didn't happen.

Also, I used to eat cat food when I was about three to five years old. Not fucking handfuls of it, but like, one kibble at a time.

I once shat in a urinal

I was a little kid, using a public toilet for the first time - I panicked

>>9305917
it happened BITCH

>>9305970
Yeah, and you had to add "4chan lol" like a little bitch.

>>9305970
lol. it would have been cool if you hadn't said "4chan". Not going to pull some dumbass "OMG RULES 1 AND 2" because those are for newfags. But, by now it should just be common sense NOT to go around advertising 4chan.

tl;dr don't say 4chan because it's gay

>>9305970
>>9305970
Hi, www.facebook.com/casori
Luthias Casori Morrison

>>9305970

Ok there Luthais Casori Morrison.

>>9306126
>>9306077
>>9306070
DAMN IT
sorry guys

>>9306157
oh well, I tried

In kindergarten, me and a couple of other guys forced this kid to take a dump in the sandbox. He kept trying, and we went inside for some juice.

one year I mooned people driving on the street in front of our house. not sure how old I was.. somewhere between 5 and 10. I did that all summer. it was such a thrill to have cars honk at me. :3 shit sucked when one of the neighbors finally called my parents. I was scared and hid in the closet until they found me. D: they just told me not to do it anymore.

Allowing my best friend to suck my dick in 5th grade. That eventually led to me sucking him. We did that for a few years until 8th or 9th grade. "spending the night" usually consisted of playing vidya and sucking dicks. Dealing with the cum was.. gross.

When I was younger I was at a train station, just fucking around with some friends and I saw this pigeon chillin' on the ground. I shouted KICKFLIP and fucking kickflipped a pigeon. i didn't expect to actually land on it.

a girl I was with slapped me and I ran away like a little pussy ;_;

>>9305970
Luthais, you look like Michael Cera.

I used to torture mice and rats that our cats brought in, usually by covering them with oil and setting on fire or putting them in a container with water and watching them drown. The worst was when i got a container and place rocks in it and let it sink in the pool i watched the mice slowly die by suffocating.

Also used to kill hundreds of bugs.

When i was 7 or so i shat my pants. My step-dad had taken me to the (kid friendly) pub and i didn't want to use the shitty toilets, so i just held it in as long as i could until it came out. Had to walk home with this turd in my pants.
No one noticed, or if they did, they didn't say anyting.

>>9306370

ahahahahhaa, i remember that thread

KICKFLIP!!

i once pissed in a mug in my parents room because i didn't want to go downstairs to the toilet

i then realised that they would realise that the mug was full of piss instead of tea so i poured it over the carpet and rubbed it in with my sock.

>>9306456
I know, everyone tells me that

>>9305916
>I used to catch lizards to throw them in other kids pants and my own pants as a kid. Dicks and lizards seem like a good mix.
> Dicks and lizards seem like a good mix.
> Dicks and lizards
> Dicks
> and
> lizards

lolwut?

When i was about 3 or 4 my mum took me to the building society, i spent the entire time i was there marching in circles saying "BANDAGE LEG" at the top of my voice..

It wasn't really in my control, but when I was 14 or so I was cramping really bad (i had just started getting my period a few months earlier) and I was soaking in a hot bath.

Well, it turns out that I had a cyst on my ovaries. I still get them, and they sometimes cause me to basically hemorrhage... sometimes to the point where I have to go to the doctor.

So yeah. First time it ever happened and I passed out in the tub from blood loss.

My stepfather heard my head hit the edge of the tub and had to pull me out of the water to revive me. It looked like someone was murdered in the tub and I was naked and in his arms.

FML.

>>9307075

i loled heartily at your misfortune

>>9307091


Oh, then you'll love the story about the second time it happened.

In school. Middle of class. Excused myself to go to the bathroom, stood up, blood everywhere, i passed out.

Got to spend 4 weeks out of school at home until they figured out what was wrong with me, though.

>>9307154

I think i love you. I'm a hemophile.

i posted on gaia online

very recently i found my old posts

i am going to invent a time machine, find my 13 year old self

and beat the ever loving shit out of him

>>9307261
oh Christ I hate doing this.

When I was in middle school I was an unholy combination of neckbeard loser and mallgoth, and I've recently gone through some of the old monster and occult-based forums I frequented.

Dear god I was a loser of titanic proportions.

You know, this thread made me think of something...

All of the shit posted here seems totally off-the-wall, until you consider that, to a little kid, the world is basically a massive playground. To a kid, there's an infinite number of fucking weird things to do just to see what it's like.

>>9307409
i try not to look back at myself between the ages of 12 and 16

boomph 4 graet justice

fsafdasfdfblox

I Became Ultraislock

>I became a faggot

This is one of the greatest threads I've seen on 4chan. Congratulations robots.

When we were 9 and 10, me and my stepsister used to take my lil bro and my lil stepbrother out for walks in the woods, make them drink loads of water, and make them piss on things so we could watch them pee. Also used to make them stand up when they were in the bath and piss on each other. Feel hella guilty about it now, but wasn't just me.

I was scared to use the bathroom at night, so i used to take off my pajama pants, lie on my belly under my bed, and piss on the floor. Also used to save food from my plate, put it in my pockets, and post it behind our blocked-off fireplace for the mice i thought lived there. Shit, our house must have smelled NASTY.

>>9293192

This shit lol'd me to sleep...

Pee Pee 7.

lulmoar

>>9308571
>>9308571

I'm sorry your dad molested you bro.

No one has ever made this post to bump this particular thread but I am making it right now.

>>9308519
More stories like this please. Shit gets me hard.

>>9293604

Yep, perfect.

I used to walk to the sink to wash my hands of jizz

Then I one day I plungered a clog and a ton of rubberized jizz caked with hair and blackness came up

When I was a teen I had this fetish (?) for fuzzy things. One time I went for a walk and saw a fuzzy glove on the side of the road; realizing the "potential", I swiftly picked it up and jammed it into my pocket. Once I got home, I washed it thoroughly, then dried it off and fapped with it. Fortunately, my parents weren't home.

i, for a short period of time, got an empty bottle of sunny d and peed in it every day, and hid it behind the sink.
someone found it though, and threw it away.
i once stuck soap up my bum because i thought "hey, i've never cleaned in there before and poo is really dirty.. better do something about that."
got a lump of soap, and shoved it up there.
it hurt like fuck.
i also used to make "potions" and stuff in the sink which consisted of shampoos and bubble bath and everything else i could get my little hands on.

>>9310992

Oh god, oh god I still do this. I hope my parents don't find it

>>9308673
Yeah, and I got paranoid that the victim would die from the piss...

yeah, i spit in my sister's shampoo. no idea why though, maybe just the idea of her having my spit in her hair was amusing.

This is probably the greatest thread ever.
I smell an archive?

>>9312642
it's being archived, last time i checked

>>9312642
I came thrice.

boomp to the extreme

I once saw a pidgeon with a broken wing in my garden , so I did the logical thing of burrying it while it was still alive ...

I used to be into spy stuff and had a notebook where I would note stuff, mainly about gossip and when I saw girls underwear. Well one day a girl finds out and got called a pervert till end of the year ( I was about 11)

Getting my mum to wipe my ass till I was like 6-7.

Chew food then spit it back out, then eat the chewed up food.

When I was 9 I often removed my shorts and sat in front of an electric fan to feel the wind on my pussy.

When I was 10 I discovered that I get turned on (very) when I try to stop peeing. There's this sensation that would make me pant and moan. I never understood why. I still do it even though I think I should stop this for hygiene's sake..

My dad used to take showers with me until I was at least 11, maybe 12. Like, he would stand in the shower with me and rub soap over me and everything. No incest tales came out of it, unfortunately.

>>9311497
my parents always got so pissed at me because of the last one, I wasted so much water and shampoo

One time in 2nd grade I was really bored so I licked the computer screen to see all the rainbow colors. Didn't seem like a big deal to me, but people made fun of me for years afterward

>>9311497
Hell yes, potions.

>>9317965
Your gender is vital to this story.

I looked up some posts I made on a Digimon forum a longass time ago.

Jesus fuck I was everything I hate. I'm pretty sure everyone there hated me, but I JUST DIDN'T FUCKING REALISE IT TIL NOW. Oh God damn I want to murder 12 year old me, time paradox or no.

>>9311497

Oh fuck, I did the potion thing too. Bit I think I used them after.

I put clamps on my nipples, and attempted to shove shampoo bottles in my cunt and ass(they didn't fit, though.). Also had some black yarn that I tied myself up with. I was 12, and had just discovered hentai on the family computer. Used to stay up late at night looking at hentai in the living room, and would be paranoid because my mom always woke up around one to go piss and snack. Didn't get caught, except that one time I forgot to clear the history. Said it was from a popup.

>>9318291
Here. I mean using the family computer, I came across hentai on the Internet. Bad phrasing.

>>9306070

>implying everyone and their mother doesn't already know about 4Chan
>Raging hard

>>>/b/

>animal cruelty
>feels really bad man

>>9311497
Don't worry, I think alot of people did that.
I did. I remember my brother doing it too.
He once threw one in my face and it gave me a nosebleed, not entirely sure how.

>>9305970
>>9305970


http://www.facebook.com/cherish.thorpe?v=wall&story_fbid=122115097827262#!/casori?ref=search&
;sid=4WjNTFy77vHDsotd1pu5yA.1282649345..1

Next time, remember to get rid of your name on the taskbar

>>9305970
Congratz, your profile picture is now a reaction image.

I used to pull my underwear over my head and adjust them to look like some sort of helmet. Then I'd pick up a pipe, and run around the house pretending I was Zero from Megaman.

BUMPING AWESOME THREAD

KNKLKMLPIFDS

>>9300808
Oh man I lol'd so fucking hard at this, anon.

>>9305970
You are an absoloute faggot.

>>9317930
Never stop doing this.

>>9318583
Haha, my brother did exactly the same, but pretended he was spiderman.

I've always been a total pervert.

I remember being only 4 years old, and whenever I was watching TV with my parents and a shampoo or cosmetics advert would come on, I'd feel my skin start to blush and a lump coming in the back of my throat. It was such an effort not to swallow or to gawp, during such moments. Those models are so beautiful! How can they sit there blankly and not be enraptured?

Anyway, I remember beginning to masturbate at the age of 8... not by friction, but by sticking things in my penis hole (When I figured out you could bring yourself to ejaculation by repeated pumps, it was a revelation! ). Eventually I was able to fit an entire glockenspiel stick in my precociously developed boy's penis. The school probably still has that intrustment and the stick.

Also I had a scat fetish for a while, but that sort of thing repulses me now. Once I plucked up the courage to cover myself head to toe in shit. This is before I was 10.

When I first started fapping, I'd do it by waving my penis up & down & letting the tip hit my open palm.

Kind of feels nostalgiac when I do it now.

>>9319253
When I first started fapping, I'd strum my boner like a guitar.
It did the job, but then puberty came, my dick got bigger and this meant it'd just flap about too much if I tried to do it the old way

Best /r9k/ thread ever.

This needs bumping.

I Used to run around in a Power rangers outfit anywhere.
>I would even Shit and Piss in it
Now i feel sad everytime i see power rangers on tv.

- i fantasized about my father, sometimes masturbating a few feet away next to him covertly. (oh god puberty, it gets even the best of us) (age 13)

-I thought Dane Cook was funny (16)

-I once honestly thought i had made an MP3 CD containing ALL good rock bands. (12)

-I used to masterbate with a pen and lotion, which by the way, females SHOULD NEVER DO THIS. You will get sick. (16)

-When i couldnt poop, or pooping was taking too long, id go in there and get the poop out myself with my hands to the best of my ability. (till age 15)

-I would let my brother play 'doctor' with me innapropriately. Then sometimes id ask for massages, and flip over so he'd massage my breasts instead. (he is like 8 years my junior and didnt have a clue what he was doing, but I enjoyed it as best as i could) (14)

- I would sometimes be in charge of bathing my brother, who has phimosis (i knew because i was there when the doctor diagnosed him). I would always attempt to pull his foreskin back. I was just trying to be a good sister and help him out, thinking that when he hits puberty he's going to be greatful BIG TIME. Eventually my parents caught on, and dissaproval flew all around. I bet my poor bro has phimosis dick to this day, i just know it. =( (12)

-I used to tell the stupidest stupidest OMFG stupidest lies ever, about being in orgies etc. I dont know what i was thinking, i cant even.. agfsajkhfg I'm so ashamed of this now, especially since all my old highschool friends know about it. (15)

-I was really shitty to my parents. Like, really shitty. I should apologize to them for having been sucha cunt once. (maybe even till now? =/)

>>9308519
We also invented some kind of bizarre rituals between ourselves, like one of our dens was up in a tree where somebody had started building a treehouse at some point, so there was a wooden platform up there. We had like three different passwords to be able to go up there, and once you were up you had to piss off the edge of the platform before you were allowed down. I remember trying to pee like a boy once, because I always felt like I was going to fall squatting over the edge, and just standing up pushing really hard, which made me pee 'outwards' for about 2 secs, and then just all down my legs and over my shoes and socks. Went and jumped in the river after that, to hide it, and just pretended I'd fallen in.

I also remember catching my stepsister in the bath with her legs up agains tthe wall and her hands behind her pussy, kind of peeing down over her chest. She said some kind of gobbledegook and told me she was doing a magic spell, which I totally believed because I was like 8 years old.

Man, it was so all about the peeing in our house. Am amazed I have escaped without some major piss fetish going on. I get halfway turned on by peeing outdoors, but that's about it. Wonder about my brothers and sisters though...

>Getting my mum to wipe my ass till I was like 6-7.

Whatisthisidonteven.jpg

>>9320108
oh one last one

I woke up once having pooped my pants, I didnt know what to do, so I hid it behind the head-board of my parent's bed. They smelled that crap for weeks before they found it, and when they did, they were PISSED. (7 yrs)

lol i still do everything OP does, way better when your high.

>>9320157
who knows you could find your pee fetish yet!

I joined a yahoo group when I was 12, which discussed masturbation - something I was just finding out about and was fascinated with. Looking back, in all probability it was just me and a few 40yr old paedos, but they used to tell stories about what them and their 'schoolfriends' had got up to together which I naively believed and thought for years that I was the only 12yr old boy in the world who didn't have epic jerk off sessions with his best friends. I was too shy to bring it up with my two friends, but secretly was pretty paranoid that they were doing it without me, so would try and make it so they would catch me jerking off all the time, but then pussy out at the last minute. The worst time was probably at my friend's pool; we were all just dicking about in the water, and I had an epic hard on. They both went indoors to get drinks and I said I'd wait in the pool, and the second they were inside I hopped out on the poolside and started jerking it really fast, thinking they'd catch me at it and we'd all start doing it together like 'normal' friends did. Lost my nerve at the last minute and i'd nearly decided to stop and get back in the water when I heard them coming back and suddenly came so hard I couldn't stop, so bent over awkwardly trying to catch the cum in my hand as it spurted out and I just ran off across the garden to keep my back to them. They shouted to ask where I was going and i just shouted 'I don't know' because I couldn't think of anything else. So my friend started running after me and I kind of fell to the ground and feigned passing out whilst wiping my handful of spunk in the ground. To this day, I'm never sure if they knew or not.

>I would let my brother play 'doctor' with me innapropriately.

I demand to know MOAR

Let's see.

I used to poke my nose up to the age of ten.

Once I peed in a trashcan in a bathroom instead of the toilet because I thought it was fun.

Once I ran up in the forest around our school and had a shit outside. I did this because one of my friends did it and I wanted to try it out too.

That's about it, I think. I'm rather normal.

>>9320272
thats funny stuff!

>>9320235

Meh. I've had a go and all, but doesn't really do much for me. Hot to think about, and not so good in practice.. Although maybe it just subconsciously brings up the guilt I harbour about my bizarre childhood. I tried masturbating whilst i was pissing once, had an amazing orgasm, and then just felt hella icky all day. Not worth it :(

>>9320315

Man, it pains me to think about it. Although I guess it could have been a lot, lot worse. Shit, I was a retard when I was a kid.

>>9320326
Seems like something to do in the shower. If it was such a nice orgasm, I think i may try it... just... in the shower, lol.

>>9320435

Hmm. Idk, for me it's good because it's 'wrong' - and it's not soooo 'wrong' to piss in the shower. Hell, I do it all the time..

>>9320494
maybe you should do it without much warning while your boyfriend is present in the shower with you. Wrong AND clean!

>>9320516

Haha, I like your thinking anon. That made me lol. Hope bf isn't reading, otherwise he'll be expecting it..

I pissed on him in the bath once, though that was more hella funny than hot and wrong. I was in a shitty hormonal mood and he was messing around putting his cock in my shampoo bottle and pretending he was going to piss in it, so I said if he did it one more fucking time, I'd piss on him. His face was a picture. Bless.

>>9320597
ahahaha. Yeah i had my boyfriend piss on me once while i was in the shower just to be an asshole. I tried to piss on him, but i dont have a hose to aim with, so it looked rather like a person humping somebody's leg hoping the pee runs down them instead of you.

>>9320615

Lulz. That image is massively amusing me.

I hump bf's leg to annoy him, sometimes. Maybe I'll start doing it in the shower and just let loose. I predict either hilarity or disgust (or a combinatin of the two) will ensue, rather than awesome sexytimez though, although could probably deal with being proved wrong.

>>9320844
ahahaha, id love to hear the outcome of this. Pity 4chan is such an impermanent place.

I used to hike up my briefs into a wedgie then sneak to the living room and watch the original series of big brother like it was porn. (before I'd seen porn)

I used sit down to strip in the hallway before taking a bath/shower because tiles are cold if you sit on them.

I used to stick fingers in my butt in the shower, before I learned to maturbate, this eventually turned into using the handle of a plunger, and accidentally shitting in the shower which I then had to clean up secretly.

I used to fap to crappy hentai on the family computer in the living room in the mornings before people got up. One time I looked around and there were guests sleeping on the couch.

>>9320914

Aye, I s'pose... although I doubt that in a more permanent (or less anonymous) arena, I'd be letting on about my plans to snidely piss on my bf's leg for giggles, you know?

If it is amazingly hilarious, or results in some kind of comedic trauma, will post a thread :)

>>9320947
I used to give myself Gigantic wedgies because if i didnt, i would get a terrible rash between my buttcheeks.

feelsbadman.jpg

>>9320999
I did it because it felt good at the time.

-My mother used to wipe my ass until I was in the 6th or 7th grade

-When in the house, I would only wear tight white underwear and no pants or shirt

-I once tasted my own shit

-When I sleepwalked once, I had diarrhea all over the toilet seat, which was down.

-I used to use my parent's VHS tape of Monster's ball to fap with. I always used to watch that Halle Berry sex scene.

I once jizzed in my own mouth on accident. I also once pissed in my own mouth on purpose.

Me any my friends used to strip naked and rub mud all over each other. We then used to run all over the forest on all fours screaming and smashing trees with branches we found pretending we were animals. Goddamn that was gay

I caught my younger brother and his friends videotaping me while I was masturbating to yaoi. It was so embarrassing. T____T

I remember when I was at daycare, probably around 4 or 5, I learned about babies. Not about sex, just about pregnancy. Me and this chick my age would sit on the ground and I'd pretend she was having a baby, and I'd get to examine and touch her pussy and shit like that. I don't regret it, it's just a sweet childhood memory.

When I was about 9 or 10 I went to this shitty little private school. I had to get in this shitty little van and it took us about half an hour to get to school. Me and my friend used to climb into the way back of the van, where there wasn't any seats, and piss and shit all over the place. Also, we'd show each other our bottoms and we'd finger each others ass cracks ? She flipped out when I showed her my clit though. Stupid bitch.

Also:

-I kept a box of spaghetti noodles in my closet and would bundle them up and suck on the ends until they fused all together and let sit them in my closet until they dried. Then I ate them. Raw spaghetti noodles in big bundles, fused together with dried saliva.

-In grade school I'd shove this rolled up bead keychain in my pants and tell everyone I grew a penis.

-Third grade I convinced my whole class that I was in a horrible accident and most of my body was rebuilt with robot parts.

-Fifth grade I used to go into AOL chatrooms for disabled support and pretend I was an adopted paraplegic and my parents died in the same accident that left me in a wheel chair. People fucking believed me too. They genuinely felt REALLY bad.

I was such a strange child. I know theres so much more, I just can't remember any right now. I fucking repressed most of it once I realized how weird it was.

>>9322507

- Used to keep dog treats in my pocket and snack on them through out the day.

- Hid down the street with my friend until way past dark. We heard our mothers yelling for us, but we stayed hidden. When we finally came out we told them our creepy neighbor chased us down there and we were afraid to come out. We rubbed scratchy leaves all over us and cut each other with sticks to make it look real.

-Used face paint to make it look like my friend fell off my swing set and knocked herself unconscious. Gave her a pretty convincing black eye. My mom, of course, flipped.

I was 10 when the Harry Potter books were first coming out and so I faked a letter from Hogwarts and put it in my friend's room one day so she could find it later.

She lived close by and when she found she came running over to my house with tears of joy screaming about how she was a witch and how happy she was.

The moment where I was childhood just.. die in her eyes when I told her it was a prank still shakes me. Man, that is something I seriously regret. She's fucking nuts now, stuck being obsessed with things from childhood. I feel like I'm a huge part of that.

>>9322950

thats...just...cold.

>>9293624
>>9301183
>>9301393
>>9301505
>>9301848
>>9306270
>>9306458
>>9303214

Sure is assburgers in here

>>9293034
>-I used to dig my asshole after I took a shit and smelled my fingers afterward. I did this from at least the 3rd grade until middle school.

I still do this now. But not directly after shitting, that's just disgusting.

I secretly enjoy Sarah McGlocklin (or however you spell it). Her voice just makes me want to fap in a meditative trance.

There, I said it.

>>9322950
I heartily LOL'd good sir. Keep it up.

Somewhere in middle school a couple of classmates and I visited our math teacher, because he had recently become a father. He was a pretty cool. He even offered us a beer. When we asked where his wife was he told us she was making dinner. Unable to resist my sexist urges, I said 'Well, at least she already knows her place.'

And the, children, is how I failed math that year.

I once fapped to gore

me and this kid who were friends from liek, age 5 to 12 used to give each other handjobs (from liek, ages 8 to 10 n watch softcore porn on the spice channel together. we didn't think it was one bit gay. i'm not ashamed of it though. it's just early exploration.

>>9293656
Is that you phil ! Was this history ??

>>9324338
>middle school
>beer
Believ-
>math teacher
lolno

I used to fap in the computer lap during my off hours senior year. Wait...I regret nothing!

>>9325332
also, forgot to mention this stuff, since after reading a ton of ppl's similar stuff, i was reminded of all this shit:

-used to kick+stomp dead pidgeons when i was 13ish and lmao'd. i still feel rly tempted to do it nowadays, but i don't.

-bit into an old green tampon on a bbq grill when i was 14 cuz i thought it would b funny

-made this thing called an 'the ultimate milkshake' when i was 13 n had a video camera n thought jackass/cky was kewl. it featured bees, mayonaise, hot sauce, sum other stuff, but most of all - a bit of my 2-week-old piss from a jar.

-had a hamster wen i was liek 10, tried to pet it through the cage, it bit me, later that night, i got sum chopsticks n while he was running on the wheel thingy, i stuck the stick in it and made him flip over backwards over n over. eventually, i got allergic to him, n had to put em in the balcony during winter time, he died.

-i never rly had weird shit/piss stuff like sum of u, but now (21) i actually rub my asshole n smell it often cuz i'm pretty dirty.

aaaand:


-when i was liek, 9 or so, me and this group of 5 kids who i hung out with in my apt. complex randomly started getting into arson. we started out just burning lots of newspapers/trash. i have no idea why we liked doing it. sumtimes we'd just burn it on the grass, sumtimes we'd jump over the wall where there was a huge empty lot in between another complex which led to a sewer where we'd find more stuff to burn. one day, sum1 lit sum fukin newspapers n threw it in one of these long, 10ft. bush/tree things in our complex. the thing eventually caught ones near it on fire n it looked like sum crazy ass cult shit. the fire department was called to put it out. the kids blamed it all on me. I never fucked with fire after that unless i was smoking something.

-when i was round 9 or 10 and biking with 2 friends around the complex, before coming back to the entrance, 2 guys in a car pulling out of the place asked us if we wanted to get in the car. thankfully, all of us were told enough times to never go anywhere with strangers. lol, gawd.

-i've fapped to gore while thinking of killing/raping a girl when i was about 18. I have a pretty nice guro collection too. From about 16-18, I wrote many many death-metal style songs about killing/torturing/raping ppl. each one had a concept, as if they were episodes. I recorded lots of songs with a friend last year, but none used any of the lengthy lyrics from those songs. i used to read lots of those lyrics to ppl at school, and used to draw pictures of cut up girls. I'm still into violence; in video games, anime, horror movies, but real gore stuff doesn't rly phase me much anymore.

You people are fucked up. The worst I can think of doesn't touch on half of this.

Thanks r9k, I can always rely on you guys to make me feel normal and sane and well adjusted.

Around age 8 I was riding my bike through my neighbor's back yard when I accidentally ran over an egg. I stopped and turned around to inspect to discover a chicken fetus. Pink slimy little shit with black eyes, motionless. I was horrified. I was convinced that I had killed one of god's children and was doomed to eternal torture in hell. I cried and prayed for forgiveness for weeks.

17 years later I enjoy watching people die.

- peed on my floor as a kid

- used to dip my balls in cups of water before I learned how to masturbate

- was like, 5 and had this 10 year old girlfriend and we went to daycare together she made me eat her pussy under these cement stairs and always asked if it tasted good

- used to mess around with my sister when I was like 5 such as taking baths together and play with her pussy, put my limp dick in her ass and make out a lot

- peed in a cup and drank it all to see what it'd taste like

- jerked off my cat a few times

- had a big crush on sandra bullock as a kid and would rub my balls all over the TV screen when I watched her movies when I was alone

my brother and I used to spread each other's asscheeks goatse style, fingerbang, etc.

Yup, totally not gay

Glad I'm not alone:
- Pissed in my friend's hot sister's drawers and stole her panties.
- Stole at least 15 panties from the aforementioned girl, my sister, and step sister. When I was home alone I'd take them all out and throw them in the air.
- Took a huge dump in one some of them, then put them in a plastic bag and hid them in the woods. I wonder if they're still there?
- Jizzed in my half sisters lotion bottle multiple times.
- When I was like 9 I'd take my sisters panties out of the hamper, put them on, and wear them while taking a bath.
- My older sister would get me to lick her pussy until she was like 10. Also, I'd always ask to my parents to have baths with her - or say I had to use the bathroom whenever she was in the bath (when were like around 10). Once, I pissed on her in the tub.
- When we'd sleep over at my grandmothers house my sister would let me suck her nipples.
- I'd always try to get my dick to touch my asshole.

Nothing else comes to mind.

This thread should be posted on a wall or something.